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I am a mom to twin boys, full-time employee of a telecommunications company and wife to a professional musician. I work, do yoga, cook and try to squeeze in DIY projects and spending time with friends.

Saturday, January 17, 2015

Funny story about how kids torture their parents

A funny story from last week.  Funny in a twisted kinda way.

A few nights ago, I had the kids solo.  Mr. Unwired was out at a gig; I made dinner, and the kids and I had a lovely meal.  Afterwords, we balanced clean-up and a few random chores, then it was time for my son to take his nightly medicine.  He takes it crushed in ice cream (yum), a flavor of his choosing.

I let him know it's time.  He agrees, I crush the pills, swirl in the Chocolate Peanut Butter Fudge (double-yum), and he reacts:

Boy:  I'm not taking this.

I reply:
Mom:  Not sure what the deal is... you agreed earlier, please take the meds and then we can go upstairs and read before bed.

Boy:  I don't like taking this.
Mom:  I'm sorry you don't like it... would another flavor of ice cream be better?  I can buy it tomorrow, for tomorrow night's dose.
Boy:  I don't like taking medicine.
then..... Boy:  It's not fair that my brother doesn't have to take medicine.
then....  Boy:  I don't want to.
then....  Boy:  You're no fun.

At some point, he agreed to take the dose mixed into milk.  Which I did.  The response was as expected at this point in the story:
Boy:  This is gross.  I'm not taking it.

After 20 minutes of handwringing and pouting and stress, we agreed that I would mix him a new dose in new ice cream.
2 minutes later, he took it.
About 5 seconds later, he cracks a joke.

Now put yourself in my shoes.  You are relieved that the medicine is down.  You are proud of yourself for remaining calm for 20 minutes of head-crushing stress that came out of nowhere.  And now the kid is cracking jokes?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?  I say:

Mom:  Hey kid, I'm glad you're cracking jokes.  Now would you kindly explaining to me what the HECK has been going on the last 20 minutes?  What was the deal with not taking your meds?  Were you just messing with me?
Boy:  Yes.  I was just messing with you.

Mom:  <head explodes>

The end.

PS:  All true.  I told Mr. Unwired the next day- he was dumbfounded.  The happy ending is that when the kid put up a fuss about something inconsequential later that week, I looked him square in the eye and said 'Stop messing with me'.  And he did.
PPS:  I recounted the story to my mom later in the week.  She replied that while the kid looks like my in-laws, he's definitely related to her side of my family.  Good story tellers, athletes and eaters.  And comedians, if sometimes a little twisted.  Ugg.

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